That’s what I‘m talking about. Today at Crossfit we had to do HSPU (hand stand push ups – for the non CFiiters). When I say I can’t do them I am not being down on myself and I fully believe one day in a galaxy far, far away I will kick those HSPU’s asses but as it stands, they are kind of kicking mine. So I am going with the best possible thing I can think of and blaming it on the fact that I weigh a tonne. Not literally. Thank god because that would be awkward. This excuse also works very well for why I am still using a pretty thick band to do pull ups. So I have decided that everyone else in the Box should be made to wear fat suits so that we all weigh the same and then they would fully understand why I am actually a rock star. There are only a couple of flaws in this plan as far as I can see and they are the following:
1.Nobody cares if I can do them unassisted or not as long as I am trying my best. (damn team spirit – one less vote for the fat suit)
2.Where on earth would I get 14 fat suits?
3.I don’t actually think I would ever be allowed back in the Box if I voiced my genius idea.
What? You think there are more than 3 flaws in my plan? Get out.
So there is only one possible thing I can do. Yup, I need to find a reverse fat suit for me to make myself only 55 kilo. So if anyone knows where I could find one of them, holla at a sista.
Until that day comes I suppose I am going to have to, shock horror, suck it up, stop whingeing, get on with it and get better ALL BY MYSELF through sheer hard work. Whatever next.